Feeling like I’ve failed

I had grand ideas for a year of more. But of course, things went off track. I fell through, I was impulsive, I shopped, I gave up. I was planning on saving money for a yoga teacher training, but then one night decided I would just sign up NOW. Which don’t get me wrong, I…

Year of More, The Beginning

After deciding to participate in a year of less, (less spending, less collecting junk, less materials) I also decided to add something into my year. Each month I’ll have a focus that I believe might improve my life in some way. Maybe it’s for my physical health, or my mental health, maybe it’s a means…

Who Am I Without Depression?

A few months ago I decided it was time to try medication. After months of fighting to get out of bed and pushing through each day only looking forward to sleep, I thought these very important words: I can’t live like this forever.  Truth is it didn’t even feel like living. It felt like hell,…

How to get back to sleep when anxiety is keeping you up at night.

Have you laid awake in bed for hours wishing you could fall asleep? Your mind just races from one thought to the next taking no breaks in between, often repeating repeating repeating things you’ve already gone over in that brain of yours. Do you ever hear the voice in your head say, “Stop thinking. You can…

Coming out of depression

Winter got me. I stayed in my house and at the same time in my depression. There have been short seasons throughout the months where I felt happy and completely free of the beast that lives in my brain. Recently, I feel free again. A lot has changed lately. I’m single, summer vacation was on…

Don’t Listen To Yourself

Yup. The title says it all. Stop listening to yourself! I took a cycling class at PowerCycle today. The woman leading us said “Don’t listen to yourself, talk to yourself. Tell yourself you can do this. You deserve this!” In that moment I had been thinking “I can’t I can’t do this.” If you hear…

Do I need AA?

This is a question that has been swirling through my head for about a year now? Am I an alcoholic? I’m not extreme, like my father who has had a standing battle with addiction for decades. I don’t even drink as often as my mother, who often coins herself as a “functioning alcoholic” usually accompanied…

Disclosing my bipolar disorder at work

I keep going back and forth, I have for weeks now. Do I tell my boss I have bipolar 2 disorder or do I not? Is it important to let her know up until mid school year I was sure that I would not renew my contract at the end of the year? When I’m…

A Reminder Why I Chose to be Sober Curious

Beginning January 1st, 2019 I made the decision to be Sober Curious (a term coined by Ruby Warrington in her book Sober Curious). Essentially I wanted to be 100% sober for the year of 2019. Would it help my anxiety or depression? Would I sleep better? How much money could I save? Would I miss…