It’s wild how I feel the day after I haven’t had my medication. Last night I got sick, shortly after taking them. I don’t think they’re in my system. Which means I feel down. I can’t focus on work. But I can’t focus on anything else either. My chest feels heavy and drinking coffee is just too hard. The only thing that sounds appealing is going to sleep, which won’t be an option for hours now.

These days drag on. The minutes go by so slowly and the hours feel like lifetimes. I push off all my responsibilities and do a lot of nothing instead. I know being productive would help me, but I just can’t muster up the courage yet to pretend that my life is normal. To act like today is a good day, and that I’m not depressed.

I don’t really know why I’m writing. I thought maybe it would help. I’m just hoping I get through this day, this feeling.