Over winter break I went on a trip to Florida with my partner. It was magical, warm, sunny and full of love. On this trip I was on the phone with my sister, and mentioned that I might be moving in with my girlfriend sometime between April and July. “Don’t rush it” she said.
My chest got tight. I almost felt defensive. I’m not rushing anything, this is my person forever. And I want this.
I want this. That hit me hard. I realized that at my true core I wanted this. Up until this moment I had gone back and forth in my head about the move in plans. I thought things like “Do I really want this or am I just trying to do the right this?” and “How will this affect my daughter or my time with my daughter?” I went back and forth almost everyday about when I should move in because I was so focused on making whatever the right move was.
But on this trip with my partner the voice in my head became clear. This is what you want, and what you deserve. That’s what makes it right. I’ve come to terms that no matter when I move in my daughter will need some time to adjust. I will need some time to adjust. My partner will need some time to adjust. But we will work through it together.
Now without all the fuzziness in my head I can see all the exciting things about moving in. My daughter gets more room, and a yard. She gets to witness some really pure and compassionate love and respect. She will live closer to her aunt and grandparents. She gets her own space upstairs for art and music, and a very safe a secure place downstairs to share as a family. She will be loved and cherished in a household that values personal growth and respect.
I get to spend every morning and night with the love of my life. I get to see her as much as I can and watch her grow each and every day. I get to make a home with someone. I get to hold her everynight and kiss her every morning.
There is so much to be excited about. I can’t wait for this next step in my life journey.