*Moved from my old blog*

I’m a mother to a super awesome three year old. I always expected parenting to be hard. Anxiety makes it so much harder though. I was watching Rogue One the other day with my family and it begins with a small girl being left all alone to fend for herself. I spent half of the movie thinking about my daughter and what would happen to her. What if she can’t defend herself (she can’t). What if I can’t always protect her (and, I can’t). What is going to happen to us?

Anxiety can be overwhelming, encompassing, and debilitating. It also, however, can be encouraging and persuasive. The next day I enrolled my daughter in a Wee Warriors class (martial arts) and I enrolled in a self defense course at the University I attend. These are great things to be involved in, but not when your spending limit is $0 and you just impulsively dropped $100+ on classes. Hopefully it’s a good investment, even though I know continuing martial arts would only get more expensive. But what can I do? My terrifying thoughts take over my mind and body, making my heart feel heavy and my brain race in a thousand different directions. Is it worth my sanity?